Back n' Fab

Hey ya'll! Back from the horrible tragedy that I like to call finals week; and a fun filled 21st birthday.
St. Patties Day + 21st B-Day = Hot Mess to the MAX.
Guaranteed I've accumulated at least 20 stories from all the weeks I've been away from my keyboard, but really... 21st birthday... I don't remember half of them.
So, let's just pick up from the latest story from last weekend.

I don't know if I've mentioned this before, but people scare me. Especially the idiots driving around me. Now, I've run over a curb or two in my life time, but really this particular woman I'm about to describe literally ran over a complete division (median) in a parking lot (she's either an idiot, or on the fast track to a DUI). Anyway, I watched this action occur while I was walking to my own car.
She stepped out of her car to inspect the damage, and I couldn't help but assess what I saw.
If she wasn't drunk, she should have been.
And that goes double in the make-up area.

Heard of the walk of shame? Miss "I just ran over a median" DEFINITELY just had the ultimate walk of shame. Between the smeared lipstick that lightly stained her lips to the black mascara chunks running down her cheeks, you could tell.
Now ladies, I'm not saying don't go out and have some fun. But, when it's time for you to actually enter the real world after a night of rolling around in someone else's sheets, take a look in the mirror before you walk out the door.

Take a piece of toilet paper, wet it, and get that s**t off your face! You've already done some regrettable things so rubbing some wet toilet paper on your face shouldn't be a huge fuss.
You won't look fab. But, hey, better than looking like Miss "I just ran over a median".

Oh, and by the way, don't run over any medians...

Stay classy guys! Well, as classy as you can.

(Oh and heads up... get dressed first too?) 

Fabulosity Walking.

Although, I know a thing or two about applying make-up, I'm always fishing for tips from ladies out there with flawless make-up. As you all know, I work in a small clothing boutique, which brings in all walks of life. And, I am not shy when it comes to talking to each customer who walks in. I mean, it's my job. The other day, when I worked the closing shift, a young woman walked in looking beyond effortlessly flawless. From her pulled back messy bun, to the the casual oversized sweater, to the airbrushed perfection of her make-up. She probably thought I was the biggest creeper ever, because I could not stop staring at her face. I was in shock. Her bronzer perfectly contoured her cheek bones, while gentle sweep of blush accented the apples of her cheeks. Perfection. I kept thinking "Damn, what am I doing wrong?" And so, I finally snapped out of my trance and asked her to tell me her secret.
It was the most ridiculous answer I've ever received; "Um, I dunno, I just do it."Like, I'm sorry m'am, but what does that even mean? There's  got to be a process to this fabulosity. But she literally could not tell me. I guess some people just have that magic touch. Or are really just that dense. Either way. Don't be afraid to ask people for some tips if you admire their look! You can look just as, or even more fab, than them!

(The source of my stories.)